1. Finish magazine (20 pages to go).
2. Corporate stationery and collateral for client.
3. Pack the last 5 years into one suitcase and a balikbayan box.
4. Get whatever is left stored. And, stored properly.
5. Meet with people. Say goodbyes.
6. Leave.

Posted by Bulletproofvest at 08:52 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)
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I heard this story over lunch today. Apparently, the Institute of Plant Breeding in Los Banos (my home town) has been breeding (what else?) hibiscus plants, more commonly known as gumamela. Somewhere in this page (way below) are some of their exploits in detail. Hibiscus is a popular ornamental plant, known for its beautiful blooms.

Lately though, they've been having a problem selling the new breeds. What cracked me up was how they solved this problem by naming the new breeds after Filipino actresses -- the kind that come out in racy movies. Bold stars eka nga. The upcoming breeds including a Maui Taylor, Aubrey Miles, Angelica Jones and a Jen Rosendahl.

Teka, kala ko ba mga Filipina?

Posted by Bulletproofvest at 08:09 AM | Permalink
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Ahhh, ukay-ukay. Haven for the bargain hunter. Stalls upon stalls, rows upon rows and nooks and crannies of shirts, pants, dresses, coats, jackets, t-shirts and shoes -- all used, all cheap.

I used to not like going to the place, because my allergies will always act up. But, thanks to Nasonex (my new bestfriend), I am able to walk among the molds and the mildews in search of a proper way to spend my 500 pesos. Indeed, 500 pesos goes a long way if you know what you're looking for. My wife picked up an Armani Exchange dress, a Jill Sander sweater (yes, Jill Sander), and a few more J.Crew sweaters all for under 500 pesos. All nice, and all (unfortunately) dry clean only. That said, last time she was here, she picked up some nice dresses (one from Comme de Garcon) that were exquisite and machine washable.

Onto me: last time I was here I picked up a vintage Mijatovic Real Madrid Jersey (the real one goes for about U$ 50 on Ebay) and a nice DKNY sweater -- both for 200 pesos each. This time around, I found two Adidas gym shirts (perfect condition) and an original Nike Team Holland (Orange Brigade, yay!) jersey (no number in the back), all for 450 pesos. There were plenty of Class A fakes so I had to be careful.

All in all, about 2 hours of rummaging through other people's clothes. Then, on the way back, karyoka (deep-fried rice cakes -- very chewy) fog coming in across Burnham Park and blogging on a dial-up connection.

Posted by Bulletproofvest at 04:17 AM | Permalink | Comments (5)
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I'm staring at the pile of CD's that I have carefully chosen -- chosen to take the long migratory flight with me to Philadelphia next week. We're moving out of the apartment in a few days, which will mean less blogging, but I hope to come around to things every once in a while.

So, there are a few things not worth bringing, just because I have them in mp3 format somewhere. Besides, most of my music is in mp3 format, and looking at the list below, I realized that I stopped buying CDs at least 2 years ago. But there are a few albums I am bringing that are best played off the CD. Tell me if I'm missing out on anything, or tell me if I'm making a mistake. In no particular order:

Paul Oakenfold: Hallucinogen
Cafe del Mar Tres
Jonatha Brooke and the Story: Plumb
Mix CD 3 Featuring Music from 12
Aztec Camera: Dreamland
Cocteau Twins: Four-Calendar Cafe
Blake Babies: Sunburn
The Essential Michael Nyman Band
Schola Hungarica: Easter
Schola Hungarica: Epiphany
Paul Van Dyk: Out There and Back
Bolipata: Pelikula
Berlin Philharmonic/Herbert von Karajan: Pictures at an Exhibition (Mussorgsky) and Le Sacre du printemps (Stravinsky)
Berlin Philharmonic/Herbert von Karajan: Tannhauser, Tristan and Isolde, Die Meistersinger von Nurnberg (Wagner
The Mission: Original Motion Picture Soundtrack
EBTG: Eden
EBTG: Idlewild
EBTG: Worldwide
EBTG: Home Movies
EBTG: Acoustic
Percolator Volume 1
The Wild Swans: Bringing Home the Ashes
Lazy Dog Deep House Music
Hotel Costes Quattre
Expreso: Otra recopilacion de canciones de Siesta

I was going to list down the stuff I would leave behind, but that would take too long. Off to packing now.

Posted by Bulletproofvest at 04:43 AM | Permalink | Comments (5)
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According to the Urban Dictionary, which is basically a blog for definitions, meanings vary:

1. Slang for Filipino male. Go, Pinoy!

2. Originally a term coined for Filipinos living in America, it has become widely used in the PI as well as the States. Huy pinoy ba kayo? Galing! Tama na yan, inuman na tayo!

3. some fine filipino guy =) daamn gurl that is one hott pinoy!!

4. Ugly little fat asian n**ger looking mexicans that put pinoy on there screen names to act like they have some kind of pride.

Posted by Bulletproofvest at 11:11 PM | Permalink
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So, over at Franklin Mills, there's an outlet store for Pepperidge Farm goodies. Whenever we're there, we spend close to, say, 14 bucks on cookies. Fourteen will get you quite a bit when a single bag will put you back by about a buck. Remember: outlet store.

Of course, everyone loves Goldfish. You can even teach math with it. But my favorite are the Mint Milanos, here enshrined.

None of it is healthy, I presume. They're cookies after all. So, the nice people at PF decided to make Natural Whole Grain bread. Curiously, none of these items are found in the outlet store.

But what interests me most is how the cookies get their fancy names. Sausalito, Santa Cruz, Nantucket -- of course, they are places in both coasts, but why those names? The ingredients don't seem to match the variety. Here, thanks to Snarkhunting, is an explanation. Branding, obviously, has a lot to do with it.

Posted by Bulletproofvest at 10:06 PM | Permalink
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I've been grumbling about the Philippines lately like I was a balikbayan: traffic, air pollution, poor services. Not to mention the slooow internet and the poor public transport.

Today, at the tail-end of the three-day Ninoy Death Anniversary weekend, I became more annoyed. Mostly from my printer, who is yet to go digital, and we're forced to go back and forth on the native files I sent her. Not only does she not support OpenType (ugh) but she's misplaced files and misread emails.

Then the bank manager I needed to talk to extended her vacation. Our photographer screwed up, but he made amends. Emails have been bouncing back (not my fault), and this illustrator I need to work with is incognite (despite having three email addresses and two cellphone numbers).

Then, I read about Angelo Barretto, who is pinoy through and through, and races cars like these and won at Le Mans (not the Le Mans) last year. Makes me proud.

Then, back to reality: breaking news is covering an armed robbery at Citibank on Paseo de Roxas. Despite a shootout, no one was hit and the robber got away. That's two blocks from where I live, and I pass by there almost everyday.

Posted by Bulletproofvest at 05:01 AM | Permalink | Comments (1)
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Surfed a bit from my in-laws' house. They only have dial-up for now, so I gleamed what I could:

1. John Geoghan meets his karma. Interestingly enough, we just picked up that book on priestly abuse.
2. Which leads me nicely to this: There's a huge sale at National Bookstore.
3. The Italian Job remake is not as good as the original. And, despite having Jason Statham, Mark Wahlberg and Edward Norton in the cast, only two punches were thrown in the entire movie. One even came from Charlize Theron.
4. Asia, Starship, Vanilla Ice and Latoya Jackson (and, sniff! Paul Oakenfold) make it to Blender's Top 50 Worst Musical Acts of All Time. They never heard of Jolina Magdangal, of course.
5. And, when you're baking guns, don't leave them in there too long.

Posted by Bulletproofvest at 02:46 AM | Permalink
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Because we don't know who the enemy is anymore.
And the best we can do is throw some yellow confetti off our windows
Have a few dozen people wave some flags
Have some washed out politicians shake some hands
and snarl up traffic in Makati
(took me almost 2 hours to take a 15 minute trip)
And because his 20th anniversary is just another three-day weekend
and because, like the Christ, the ransom paid by his death
has devalued along with the peso.
And because most of us don't really give a rat's ass anymore.

Posted by Bulletproofvest at 02:49 AM | Permalink | Comments (8)
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Oddly enough, mine is the theme from CSI, and some times the Mentos commercial theme.

There's nothing nicer than a tune playing in your head -- until you can't turn it off.

The phenomenon has spanned the ages. In 1882, Mark Twain wrote in a short story of an annoying "jingling rhyme" that became indelibly lodged in the author's mind until he passed the curse along to another hapless victim. This summer, a community board in Brooklyn, N.Y., has called for a limit on the playing of the "Mr. Softee" jingle by ice-cream trucks -- a jingle that can be unbearably memorable for those subjected to it for extended periods.

Research has helped define, but not explain, the experience. A recent study by the University of Cincinnati looked at the affliction, which the author, James Kellaris, calls "earworms" from the German word ohrwurm. The ear part is obvious, but the worm part isn't incidental. Kellaris, a consumer psychologist, says it conveys the parasitic nature of the travel of songs into their listeners' ears, only to then get lodged and played on mental continuum.

He found that some 98 percent of listeners were at one time or another bothered by a tune that wouldn't leave their heads. The study also found some common offenders, including the Kit-Kat jingle ("Gimme a break"), "Who Let the Dogs Out," Queen's "We Will Rock You," the theme to "Mission: Impossible," "YMCA," "Whoomp, There It Is," "The Lion Sleeps Tonight" and "It's a Small World After All."

And, if you've missed it: customs officials are multi-millionaires. Now, who didn't know that?

Posted by Bulletproofvest at 08:25 PM | Permalink
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Don't you know that when I leave
My eyes become a million pieces of
glass?

There are six windows
and three brown splotches, must be
from the last time
I rode it like a
cannonball.
Tumbling.

The line on the left side
reverse artwork on a nude
metallic canvas.
It's a
reputation preceding.

There is a force on your elbows
when you follow the invisible line
it climbs into your eyes
like an
earthquake arching.

Posted by Bulletproofvest at 04:31 AM | Permalink
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Burn, baby, burn!

The cooks at Dencio's know how to show-off.

Posted by Bulletproofvest at 03:46 AM | Permalink
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I've long wondered about how working on EST in any one of hundreds of call centers here in the Philippines affects the lives of thousands of 20-somethings with college degrees from good schools and nowhere to go. I know three people who work at call centers, and they all wished they were working elsewhere.

The hours are a bitch, but the pay is good. Moreover, overtime is pretty common. But, at the end of the day, if it puts food on the table (or smokes to go with the beer and credit in their cellphones), they'd hold on to the job -- better than nothing, they suppose.

These days, a large majority of English, Psychology and Communication graduates, end up working in call centers, answering emails with the handle "Sara Jones" or "Brian" instead of Belen or Jon-jon. But the business is growing so fast (and, conversely, employment elsewhere increasingly sparse) that any surplus of graduates from other fields are sitting in front of their PCs chatting with clients in the East Coast at 4 in the morning. There are in fact schools that give out certificates for call center operator wannabes, much like the seafarer schools dotting the countryside.

Nuki's uchi's blog would probably have more pages if it wasn't for the fact that he works late into the night.

I think working at call centers typify the status of the large majority of the Filipino workforce: like nurses and seamen (I heard 1 in 5 worldwide are Filipinos), theyre in jobs they had no choice but to take. And, the miss out on friends and family. Right now, I'm trying to find time to get together with a friend working in a call center. Of course, he has time; four AM he takes his coffee. Even Burgos is asleep by then.

Posted by Bulletproofvest at 01:53 AM | Permalink | Comments (1)
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I don't blog a lot about the soft porn industry in the Philippines. In fact, why should I?

Except of course if it's metric-sh*tload-juicy and entertaining, or involves people I like to hate, like Tim Yap or Kris Aquino. There is, however, the crazy monkey sh*t that happens every so often that's pretty hard to ignore, like this headline.

First Time ang biggest break ng seksing si Jen Rosendahl. May love scene siya with Bobby Andrews, ganu’n din sa mga baguhang sina TJ Trinidad at John-C. Borjal. Inamin ni Jen na may butt exposure siya sa pelikula, but no frontal.

A reporter asked Jen kung kailan ‘yung first time nito sa sex, pero mukhang ‘di nasiyahan ang nagtanong sa sagot ng sexy star.

"I’m a virgin. Swear!" diin ni Jen. "Kaya hirap ako sa love scene namin. Hiyang-hiya ako. Kasi, kahit I’m a German, I’m Filipino inside."

Hindi pa raw siya ready na ibigay ang sarili sa lalaki. Ayaw rin niya na basta-basta na lang siya makikipag-sex.

"Petting lang, alang penetration. ‘Pag na-arouse ‘yung guy, sasampalin ko. Gusto ko something special. Pipili ako nu’ng right guy. Maiintindihan naman siguro nu’ng guy, ‘di ba?"

Translation is something like: "I'm a virgin. Swear! That's why I find our love scene difficult. I get really embarassed. Just petting, no penetration. If the guy gets aroused, I will slap him. I want something special. I will choose the right guy."

Anyway, I'm sure there are other more interesting things to blog about.

Posted by Bulletproofvest at 01:11 AM | Permalink
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Philippine Senate finally says you can be both. Scholars of transnationalism be advised.

THE Senate on Tuesday ratified the consolidated version of the dual citizenship bill, otherwise known as the Citizenship Retention and Reacquisition Act of 2003, and is up for floor deliberations.

Senate President Franklin Drilon said if signed into law, the bill would benefit millions of former Filipino citizens who had migrated to their host countries.

“The passage of this bill is an affirmation that the Filipino people embrace our Filipino brothers abroad and that we highly appreciate their continued contribution in keeping our economy afloat,” Drilon said.

The bill provides that natural-born citizens of the Philippines who have acquired citizenship in their host countries can retain their nationality but they have to take first their oath of allegiance to the Republic of the Philippines.

Posted by Bulletproofvest at 12:53 AM | Permalink
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Surfing aimlessly, I found this:

"The making of stereoscopic pictures is one of the most lucrative departments of photography, and the number and variety of subjects everywhere obtainable of the wonders of the world, together with the vast assortment of historical views, and local bits of interest, make a collection of endless extent and beauty."

(A Practical Suggestion for Stereo-Landscape Negatives. Photographic Mosaics; an annual record of photographic progress. 1874, p. 121).

A lot of interesting reading in the back part of the stereocard. Interesting how the description is translated from English to French, German, Spanish, Dutch (I think) and Russian.

UPDATE: Can someone confirm whether c.1874 is correct?

Posted by Bulletproofvest at 12:56 AM | Permalink
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Something's wrong with my USB mouse -- it keeps getting installed and re-installed. "Click" installed. Then I use it for about three seconds, then "click" uninstalled. Click, then click again. I tried using the mouse in the other computer and it worked fine there. I tried manually uninstalling, deleting the driver, downloading a fresh one, then reinstalling it back again. Same problem. Click, then click again.

I'm going to the store to buy a new mouse and see if that helps. Meanwhile, no surfing unless I want CTS.

Posted by Bulletproofvest at 12:49 AM | Permalink
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1. How much time do you spend online each day?
I'm basically online all day. But I spend about 2 hours everyday surfing, answering email, reading news, blogging, mostly at night or early morning.

2. What is your browser homepage set to?
Google.com

3. Do you use any instant messaging programs? If so, which one(s)?
Yahoo.

4. Where was your first webpage located?
I've worked on other websites before, but my first is www.622design.com

5. How long have you had your current website?
For about 5 months now.

Posted by Bulletproofvest at 12:52 AM | Permalink
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This one has been going around for some time.

An elderly doctor at the Makati Medical Center was riding the elevator going down to the lobby. Next to him is another patient. A bell sounds and the car door swings open. In front of the pair stands a young boy. The little boy asks: "Down?" The doctor looks up and down the young man and, with a slight crackling in his voice, answers: "No, this is going up." He then presses the button to close the elevator door and sends the car on its way.

The patient, confused, asks: "Why didn't you let him ride with us. This car is going down anyway." The doctor looks to the patient and says, "He was my patient a week ago. He died of leukemia."

There is a short silence. The patient then asks: "How do you know he died?" The doctor glances back and says, "Well, he has a blue band on his ankle. That means he's dead."

The patient sticks out her foot and asks the doctor: "Oh, you mean like the one I have?"

Posted by Bulletproofvest at 08:56 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)
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So the story goes that at the Insular Life Building, which sits opposite the BPI building at the corner of Paseo and Ayala, has it's own share of ghoulies.

A man pulling in late hours left his office from the 9th floor around 3 in the morning. Taking the elevator down, the car stopped at the 7th floor. As the doors parted, a young woman's face peered into view: "Going up?" The man responded: "No, going down." She smiles and says, "Thank you." As the elevator closes, the man thinks to himself, "Wow, she's really pulling in the hours."

Upon alighting in the building lobby, curious, he walks over to the lobby guard and asks: "Who is the woman in the 7th floor? Why is she working so late? It's almost 3 in the morning." The guard, unsurprised, says, "There are no offices in the 7th floor -- it's all vacant. You must have seen the daughter of the building's owner. She jumped from the 12th floor a long time ago. Sad, sad story. When she hit the 7th floor, she got decapitated."

The man's jaw drops. The guard continues: "Which is why you only see her head when she peers into the elevator."

Posted by Bulletproofvest at 08:44 PM | Permalink | Comments (2)
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Been busy lately -- the new magazine issue is trickling in. And watching the "brown-out" in New York was quite amusing. I did have time to surf a bit, and here's a link round-up:

Know your landmines, Battlefield experts.
Osang gets clean (and saves milk money).
This year's best movie, Finding Nemo, is set to be upstaged by Battle Royale (thanks, Kuya -- now downloading) and surely, The Return of the King.
And, most disturbing, Grendel comes to dinner (not for the timid).

Posted by Bulletproofvest at 08:09 PM | Permalink
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So, while I continue on this vein of advertising and design, I'm posting a link to Taxonomy of Biotech and Pharmaceutical Names by Level of Engagement. Someone should do this for detergent soap names here in the Philippines

Posted by Bulletproofvest at 06:10 AM | Permalink
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Having worked briefly as a copywriter, crafting advertising slogans, though waning in relevance, is the single most compressed practice of wit, cleverness and marketing acumen: say everything you need to say in the fewest words possible. Sometimes, as in the case of some of my clients, not having a slogan produces the best results.

I have a longstanding admiration for Avis' "We try harder." Sure enough, it's come out as one of the top slogans in this Hall of Fame (of sorts). My new favorite: "Heineken refreshes the parts other beers cannot reach."

Posted by Bulletproofvest at 04:32 AM | Permalink
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I walk towards the crowd.
Criss-crossing cement, I plant my feet on words.
Strangers unknotting themselves. I slip mercilessly.

The lady litters with whispers: why are you wearing those shorts?
I answer: because I like them.
She flies away. Her mouth speaking backwards. Her eyelashes a deep blue.

Middle-aged man: I am plagued.
The lines on his face like prison grills.
Walk on -- I said -- deliver yourself.
No point in making it to the next chapter, his reply.

I know this like a chance I should have taken.
Like a vaccine.

Samosas. Across the street from this marbled, leathered lobby.
Trees cast shadows like hunkering leopards.
The blinking signs. Hardly remembered.
Avoiding the spit: I trip on the curb.

The creek follows the line of the road.
A guilty stench. A wordless murky stream.
Dangerous and gentle. The city hall looms above.

A monologue from a security guard: everyday I buy your softdrinks and your bread.
How come you never give me a discount?
Another: how many times do you need to tell me that?
If there was a fruit stand, I would descend rapidly.

There are incantations with text the size of shrimp
etched on the walls of the synogogue.
I make it to my doorstep. An uncomplicated silence ensues.
Along with: cigarette smoke and the chatter of children.

Posted by Bulletproofvest at 03:54 AM | Permalink
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Everyone knows the Philippines is the Texting Capital of the World. But if you don't know it yet, on the Globe:

Talk isn't cheap in the Philippines; there are only about 3.3 million wired phone circuits in this country of about 80 million people. There are another 10 million cellphones here, but companies don't offer the large baskets of ''free'' minutes that we Americans take for granted. So SMS is the least expensive way to chat, popular with everybody from cab drivers to corporate executives.

[Compared to the U.S. which hit a billion SMS messages for the whole year last year] Filipinos crank out a billion SMS messages every 10 days, making this country the texting capital of the world. Nobody believes that Americans will ever catch up. But then, there's no reason why we should. Between our nation's excellent wired phone system and its cheap cellphone networks, it's easier to make a regular voice phone call than to peck out a text message on a numeric keypad. Most of us have Internet-connected computers at home or at work. We can use these to send e-mails and instant messages, instead of fussing with a cellphone.

Posted by Bulletproofvest at 02:18 AM | Permalink
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Growing up in the 80's meant you had the Bugs Bunny Show in the mornings at IBC 13, and reruns in Saturday Fun Machine on Channel 9. Here's a trip down memory lane:

HILLBILLY HARE
(McKimson-1950)
Promenade across the floor
Sass shay right on out the door
Out the door and in to the glade
And everybody promenade

Step right up, you're doing fine
I'll pull your beard, you pull mine
Yank it again, like you did before
Break it up with a tug of war

Now into the brook and fish for the trout
Dive right in and splash about
Trout, trout, pretty little trout
One more splash and come right out

Shake like a hound dog, shake again
Wallow around in the old pig pen
Wallow some more, you all know how
Roll around like an old fat sow

Allemande left with your left hand
Follow through with a right-left grand
Now lead your partner, the dirty ol' thing
Follow through with an elbow swing

Grab a fence post, hold it tight
Whomp your partner with all your might
Hit him in the shin, hit him in the head
Hit him again, the critter ain't dead

Wop him low and wop him high
Stick your finger in his eye
Pretty little rhythm, pretty little sound
Bang your heads against the ground

Promenade all around the room
Promenade like a bride and groom
Open up the door and step right in
Close the door and into a spin

Whirl, whirl, twist and twirl
Jump all around like a flying squirrel
Now don't you cuss and don't you swear
Just come right out and form a square

Now right hand over and left hand under
Both join hands and run like thunder
Over the hill and over the dale
Duck your head and lift your tail

Don't you stray and don't you roam
Turn it around and promenade home
Corn in the crib pen, wheat in the sack
Turn your partner, promenade back

And now you're home
Bow to your partner
Bow to the gent across the hall
And that is all

Posted by Bulletproofvest at 11:37 PM | Permalink
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Something that happened back in 2001: Atienza sends porn and gambling to hell, sets himself on fire in the process. Anyone have pics of this?

A city mayor and four bystanders caught fire during a public burning ceremony of porn and gambling machines in the Philippines

Lito Atienza, the mayor of Manila, was engulfed in flames quickly put out by aides after setting fire to the stack.

Too much petrol had been poured on the huge pile of goods seized by police during raids. It was a publicity stunt to highlight a crackdown on crime.

Two press photographers and two others also caught fire and had to be rushed to hospital suffering from second- and third-degree burns.

Video gambling machines, porn magazines and compact discs were burned during the ceremony attended by the mayor, city police chiefs and press.

Posted by Bulletproofvest at 11:25 PM | Permalink
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